We won’t always get who we want. But there is a reason we don’t end up with everyone that catches our eye at first the glimpse. We look everywhere for someone we want to show off, to be proud of, to stare at while wondering how the hell we got so lucky. But that person could be under our noses the entire time. It could be your best friend. It could be the person you console when life throws them a curve-ball or vice versa. Sometimes we don’t need to look because we are the ones being looked for. What we need to do is focus on making our lives happy, successful and ready for both ourselves and visitors with good intentions. We never know right off the bat whether the next person will either mend our hearts or step on the broken pieces. It’s wise not to open up completely to everyone you meet, but don’t keep a 60 ft. cement wall up the entire time either. Be aware, but don’t be afraid. We all learn lessons, so don’t consider anyone a mistake.
I had a discussion about “connection” today with a new friend of mine. And there was one thing she said that really opened up my mind.
“We filter what we want to see in people”.
Meaning, we see what we think makes someone perfect when in reality, from an outside perspective, they are no good. We gawk at someone with whom we are infatuated. They’re flawless and they can do no wrong. But that’s because we don’t feel the heat of their fire. We could be burning and we wouldn’t know it. Eventually, we become ash. We remain that way until someone sees us for the phoenix we will soon become. We will be born again. Not with someone who would burn us, but would be our suture. Someone who would lay their hand on our wound and hold it there until it heals.
If we never blink to see someone for both their perfection and their flaws, how do we know it’s real?
Do not be deceived by the beauty of the serpent.
There are times when something happens unexpectedly that we didn’t wish for. But we don’t realize until later that it was needed to get us back on the path to success and happiness. We don’t always discipline ourselves on our own, so things happen that we can neither prevent nor change so we have no choice but to move forward.
A blessing for me is being given the gift to bless my enemies. To bless those less fortunate than myself. To bless those who wish negativity on me and think poorly of my lifestyle. Because I come home to the reassurance that a miracle that is fueled by my struggles and everyone waiting for me to fall is on it’s way to deliver itself to me. And a miracle is on it’s way to you, fueled by your struggles.
Whatever it is that is keeping you stuck, it’s almost over.
Wandering down a withered road, where weeping willows often grow,
How and why I’ll never know, for near this place I never go.
Further down I stroll along, with heave and wonder it pulls me strong.
Weak and weary this path prolongs, the gusts they hum it’s somber song.
As I near, I spot in sight a relinquished residence, as silent as night.
Permeating through dust, the Sun’s incandescent light.
I am tempted to be afraid of what seems so trite.
Easy, I make my way around, slow to perceive what has been found.
Beneath the rotted soil in ground, A genesis of the earth sprouts small and sound.
I kneel to awe at this miracle of God, that’s striven in such a place where bliss is fraud.
From that day forward, with joy abroad, I came to nurture the blooming pod.
58 years and some time has passed, and on this day begins the past.
No longer does it stand tall and vast,
But scattered it lay, lifeless and gray cast.
All these decades, all these days, I spent with, for a moment, what I loved and prayed.
And on this 7th day of May, the center of my life has finally frayed.
When the sky engulfs in clouds of gray, and the atmosphere brings upon dismay,
With serendipity you’ll discover along your way, the seed of hope and new life awaits.
When overcome by rage and fury, a person loses touch of reality, of themselves, and imprints the forth coming agony on the hearts of those they cherish most. With just words, without the cautionary thought put forth before speaking them. It isn’t until their cherished are gone, that they open their eyes to the hiding sun above the clouds. A puncture to the soul is excruciating. Beyond a physical sense. The mouth that speaks the tongue of hate, envy, defiance, is sewn shut by the reflection of the ailing silence to whom those poisons are spoken. The body, mind, spirit and soul of the guilty is then tortured for what seems an eternity. Not only are the warm-harboring damaged, but the wrong suffer in silence. Far more painful, far more enduring of a long and blistering memory stalking in the present. A lesson long needed be learned, but a lesson learned indeed. The yearning for love and friendship is forever, but Utopian. No scorch of fire, no cold of winter could ever be so unforgiving.
Letting someone go, someone you love with every fiber of your heart and soul, is one of the most painful experiences we could endure. It’s something we swear to ourselves we can never get through. It feels like the end of us, and the end of any hope we had left in our hearts. But what we don’t think about is why it happens. I’ve always believed that if you love something, let it go. If it’s meant to be, it will come back to you and be yours forever. Read over that sentence a few times. Grasp the message it gives. Letting someone go gives you the opportunity to focus on yourself for a while. You can occupy yourself with so many positive things during that time. Hurting is almost inevitable, but keeping yourself busy eases the pain and helps you discover new things in life that you probably never knew existed before. Discover things that will improve the meaning or purpose you seek in your life. Don’t go looking for the person you let go. Serendipity plays a big part here because the best things in life are unexpected or randomly stumbled upon. Take it day by day without dwelling on the past or wondering about the future. We have no control over those. We control what we do now and how we plan to better ourselves. It is all temporary and in the end, letting go may have been what gave yourself the best self-confidence and open-mindedness yet. A goodbye doesn’t always signify “forever”. It is the comma in a sentence. Eventually, you have to pick up where you left off.
If you have lost someone you loved and are going through rough patches in life, or miss them more than ever, call upon them. Ask for them. They’re a free soul, a free spirit, free to roam as they please. Sometimes when you least expect it, they will pay what seems to be a quick visit, but is in fact a life-altering moment, a calm after a storm and an all-around sense of peace. Just because they are no longer a physical presence doesn’t mean their energy and soul are gone. Love is intangible. Therefore, it never dies.
Being in love doesn’t necessarily mean you’re happy. When you realize that, you must choose between hurting now and being happy later, or always hurting and never being happy because you confuse it with love and begin to accuse yourself of preventing your own happiness, which is unhealthy.
Thanks for stopping by and welcome to my new blog. This is just an introductory post so I’ll keep it brief.
I decided to start a blog because I know many people need guidance at some point in life. I feel I could provide that by simply posting passages of advice that I have come up with to give others a sense of relief and a little push each day to help get through whatever obstacles may be in their way at that moment.
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